i cant wear red lipstick because it accentuates my mustache

caressmelouis:

when u come home from school and take ur makeup off

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andrewjacksonjihads:

i want someone who will sit on a rooftop with me at 3 am and shave their head while i shave my head and then hotglue the hair to the roof so the roof will have hair

mememaster:

are you kidding me

mememaster:

are you kidding me

perseues:

when will my reflection show who i am inside

perseues:

when will my reflection show who i am inside

snorlaxatives:

me: *eats cookie dough*

some weak ass person: “you’ll get salmonella poisoning!!!” 

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